The following are things you may or may not need to know about me. They may or may not be embellished truths, but in my experience, reality is so much more hilarious.
I am related by marriage to Mr. Haney from Green Acres. And I’m not talking second cousin once removed. Pat Buttram was my husband’s great-uncle. Kind of a lame pick-up line, if you ask me. But then again, maybe you shouldn’t ask me, because apparently it worked.
I am a second-generation Asian-American. Both my parents immigrated here from the Philippines. Though I was born in the Philippines, my dad was in the United States military, so I’ve pretty much lived my whole life on American soil. I can’t speak much Tagalog (shame), but love the richness of my culture all the same. And the food. Definitely the food.
I am married with children, but without the TV show. Hubs was conned into marrying me almost a decade ago, got me knocked up with my boy Bug, and then it happened again with Bean. The four of us have way too much fun than should be allowed in one family. Where’s the dysfunction? Although, I should probably ask that question again when they are teenagers.
I come from a big, ridiculous, sloppy-kisses family. No, really. We all love each other. Like, a lot. My older brother is The Best, my two sisters are actually my two best friends, and my parents are flawless. My parents have always stressed the importance of Family First. It wasn’t too popular with us kids when we had to be home before midnight on New Year’s Eve, when all our friends were off kissing each other at 12:01 (what would their mothers say?!), but it set a good precedent for the coming year to ring it in with family.
I have a major crush on God. I wasn’t born and baptized into the church. Up until I was in sixth grade, church was reserved for midnight mass on Christmas eve. But then we moved to the Bible belt and next door to a preacher, so it was all but inevitable that we meet this Jesus guy and go over to His house on non-holidays. I like Him, I like to talk about Him, and I can’t wait to meet Him in person. (I hear He’s tall.)
I am entomophobic. Self-diagnosed, of course. I remember a time when I was just averagely afraid of bugs, but that was before my own mother started chasing me with dead bugs and exploiting that once-mild fear. Now it is full-blown. I can’t even get close enough to bugs to squash them. Instead, I will spray them (from a safe distance) with whatever I have on hand: Lysol, Febreze, hairspray…all deadly in copious amounts.
I love to write. And laugh. And laugh at what I write. (I hope you do, too!) Maybe one day someone will pay me for it. (That is, for the writing bit. I don’t think they pay people to laugh, but if you hear of a job opening in that market, let me know, would you? Thanks.)
And lastly, we are all ridiculously good-looking. Just take my word for it.
Meet the Buttrams 
You are hysterical, I love your blog, and wish as well that one day you get paid for your writing:)
-Alison (Elizabeth’s sis)
Okay – love this “About” page. Had to read it first after catching your comment on my post. Can’t wait to lurk around your blog. But not in a creepy way. Just mildly stalker-ish. Mildly.
Also. Are you on Twitter? Would love to follow you. But fair warning: I’m the opposite of Stylish. And I do not know what Caber Tossing is.
Thanks Ironic Mom…
(p.s. I’m @juliecgardner on Twitter if you do that kind of thing. I’m totally technologically challenged, so my apologies in advance.)
Thanks!! I totally spent more than an un-creepy amount of time on your blog after being directed there.
I’m @jbuttwhatwhat on Twitter. But I’m never actually on Twitter. Except for when I am. We can be Tweeps!
Just joined the red dress club. Checking out everyone’s blogs and spreading some love (newsfeed). Please come by and visit too!
Funny list. Enjoying looking around and seeing how the other half thinks. (Certainly have not figured out my other half yet but that doesn’t mean I’m not trying.)
Charles
Good man for trying! Unfortunately, my brain generally works atypically from other females. Good luck though!
Very cool – my hubs, who I refer to on my blog as Mr. Pavlov, is Filipino born and raised! We’ve been to the PI and were the “all you can eat buffet” for some King Kong mutant blood sucking critters. It was quite the experience and the Mangos made it almost worth the blood donation!
Great site!
Beth
Thanks for stopping by! My parents are going back for a month this summer. I haven’t been back since I was born. Hopefully I will get the chance one day soon!
Wow, summer? We went in Dec after a recent Typhoon and nearly died from the heat. I think we are going within the next year….or two. I have an outreach there. Check out http://www.internationreliefmissions.com (it’s posted at the top of my blog too). Glad I met you 🙂
Beth
oops – http://www.internationalreliefmissions.com
I am jumping around WP tonight and came across your blog. Love this about page. It’s so nice to meet another trophy wife. Hope you don’t mind if I meander around your site for a little bit.
Meanderers welcome!
Love your about page!
HI! I am Filipina too and a stay at home Mom in Connecticut.
I have enjoyed visiting your blog. I am your newest subscriber.
Happy New Years!
Cheers,
Louise
Hi Mrs. Butt! So glad I found you via your guest post at Tamara’s! I love finding new great bloggers, especially with humor!
You are a scream! (Any friend of Leigh’s is a friend of mine.) I so love funny people and you are FUNNY! Glad to be reading! and laughing.
I don’t know how I stumbled upon your blog but I’m glad I did! I too am Pinay and migrated here 23 years ago… my accent comes out when my husband pisses me off! I took my daughter to the Philippines for the first time last summer, we stayed for 5 weeks. When we came home, SHE had an accent! Now she gets my humor, I lover her but she’s turning 13 in 2 weeks, so let’s see if I’ll still love her then!
Love your writing style… want to write a play with me? Ok, I will go stalk pages of your blog for now. Have a good one!
Hah! It’s the same way with my parents’ accents too. It’s the measure of TRUE anger in our house.
I am so stoked I stumbled across your blog, you’re hilarious AND inspirational! Great writing!
You made me laugh. So we’re both Filipinas, except that I am more well verse with Tagalog, I’m from Davao so that makes me not so fluent with it. ( another shame). Diverse culture, we have. The importance of family togetherness is the best. But my parents are separated, so I’m missing it out a lot! Sigh*… Oh enough about me. Glad to have found your blog. You guys are really good looking, in fact! 😉
Your Bio is a crackup! Look forward to reading your post.
Congratulations for making it to FRESHLY PRESSED. I’m a Filipina, too… living in Korea. I’m happy to see a FELLOW Filipino on FRESHLY PRESSED. Keep it up! ^^
FROM KOREA WITH LOVE~~~http://chrissantosra.wordpress.com/
I’m happy to know that you take joy and pride of your family’s heritage. I’m trying to give my 6 year old a beautiful memory of the Philippines even if he’s born in the U.S. I think it’s vital for them not to loose that cultural identity and the to appreciate our humble beginnings. Your blog has a lot of heart to give….Thank you…wishing you and your family the best…
I love the way you write your about page. i suck at about-me writings.
Oh my goodness! You’re cracking me up 🙂 I love the way you describe yourself, and I aspire to be a stay-at-home-mom who doesn’t do chores just like you. You are a new hero to me! I’m looking forward to further exploring your blog. Thanks for sharing!
Hello, nice to discover your blog via freshly pressed! I’m a writer/mum/boat sweeper bound to England by love and marriage but I was born and raised in the Philippines 🙂 Your posts are engaging. I’ve been to your other blog, too. I like the wordplay. Keep up the good work!
Wow! Best about page yet! I really enjoyed your blog and your humor. Oh and p.s. I’m not a fan of bugs either LOL, I too grab anything in sight to spray them with!
I’ve nominated you for the Most Verstile Blogger Award! I think your blog is awesome!
Click here for more details http://kissandhide.wordpress.com/2012/03/15/they-like-me-they-really-like-me/
I see I’m double dipping here, but I also just nominated you for The Versatile Blogger award! Love the humor all over your blog 🙂 http://nausheenfarishta.wordpress.com/2012/05/03/procrastination-strikes-again/
Hey I loved your blog. It is so amazing and warm 🙂 And the introduction is fun as well !! Good going.
Love your ‘About.’ Makes readers want to be Buttrams too!
AnnMarie
I love this. You are so funny. Keep it going.