The Thanksgiving Shaft

Whenever I drive by someone’s house and there are Christmas decorations up, I literally want to jump out of my car and tackle that little white-lighted reindeer TO THE GROUND.

Because I love Thanksgiving.

So. So. Much.

I don’t mean to brag, but I’m kind of a foodie. For every box of Kraft Macaroni and Cheese in my pantry, I have an exponential amount of things that you would find in Martha Stewart’s kitchen.

For example, I have a rotating supply of fresh herbs in my crisper. (Also, I know that the drawer in the refrigerator for produce is called the Crisper.)

I have things like ginger paste, fresh eggplant, white wine vinegar and orzo in my kitchen RIGHT THIS MOMENT.

I had a blog war over doughnuts.

So I get angry — no, livid, really — when America goes from creepy, spooky Halloween to jingle bells and dashing through the snow.

WHAT ABOUT THANKSGIVING, YOU GUYS?

Luckily, because I won the doughnut war*, Knox let me rant about Thanksgiving over on his blog. And you guys, he actually agrees with me on this point. Ah, the unifying powers of gluttony.

So please go over there and read it. I would love nothing more than for you to see my crotchety-old-man side. NOW GET OFF MY LAWN and go read it.

*The viewpoint on this blog does not necessarily coincide with public opinion.

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18 Comments

Filed under Guest Posts

18 responses to “The Thanksgiving Shaft

  1. The nice thing about public opinion is that it doesn’t always coincide with fact.

    But they nailed it on this one.

  2. But what does Crisper ACTUALLY MEAN?

    I refer to it as the place where I put my sandwich meats.

  3. Haha. The first sentence captured my thoughts exactly. I fought the urge to “accidentally” knock down the Christmas display in Target yesterday 🙂

  4. The nice thing about Canadian Thanksgiving is that it’s in early October. No competition from reindeer. Maybe pumpkins. Wait. Pumpkins are part of harvest.

    And I had barbecued eggplant last night, which I love. It’s that vegetable that feels like you’re eating protein or carbs or something deliciously naughty.

  5. Yesterday I learned that the local music stations are going to start running their holiday music on my birthday: November 18.

    So we can all eat turkey while listening to “Come all Ye Faithful.” And “The Dreidel Song.”

    Too early I say!

    I now over to Knox’s. 😉

  6. Ha! I literally groaned when I went to Target today (to buy the last Harry Potter DVD, natch, which just came out today!) and saw the Christmas decorations on the street lights in town! This year for Thanksgiving I’m attempting to make a pumpkin cheesecake, no short cuts. I’ve only made cheesecake once or twice, but I think I can pull it off!

  7. And here all along, I’ve been calling that drawer the More Crisp.

    DANG it.

    (Off to read your rant!)

  8. Elena Aitken

    Fortunately for us Canadians, Thanksgiving fills the gap between back to school and Halloween. But, we trick-or-treated at a house with Christmas lights and reindeer on the lawn. It’s SO wrong!

    And…did someone say pumpkin cheesecake?!

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